Posting this lovely chat will come back to bite me, I’m sure, and cost us hundreds of dollars in therapy for our child one day, but some of the most delicately funny moments in life just HAVE to be preserved. Plus, she’s growing up in THIS household; sharing about bodily functions is easier than breathing…
7:29 PM me: i just spent 20 minutes reteaching Alli how to wipe her a**.
This after the 3rd day of finding poop on the bathroom floor, her feet, and her leg.
7:30 PM andrew: Wow
What was her style before?
7:31 PM I think ill stay here tonight. Sounds scary there
me: throw gigantic gobs of paper at her buttcheeks and see what happens.
no effort at the crack whatsoever.
and gobs too big to fit said crack.
hey, you asked.
7:32 PM You cracking up the room
7:34 PM me: you owe me.
she’s a Bernstein thru and thru.
andrew: Ill teach you how to wipe your a** when I get home
me: I’m good, thanks. But maybe you can share some of your art with your child.
7:35 PM andrew: You saying hartmans are good wipers?
me: I just thought you had the whole bathroom routine mastered.
7:36 PM I even put the paper in the toilet when I’m done
§ Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.